Back to the Future

As an addendum to my previous statement, I learned this weekend that there IS a future in sport ...when you're sitting on a sideline.

At half of an incredible game by the Harvard men (Regionals Champions, on the way to Nationals for the second year in a row), I went to watch the womens finals between Darthmouth and Tufts.

My coach looked over at me and said,
"Three more years, LeeAnn."
"What?"
"Three more years and you'll be in this game."

I just smiled and sighed. We were knocked out on the first day of the tournament, losing to Yale and Vermont. I played a few points, but as a rookie mostly watched from the sideline as the veterans failed to meet their own expectations and we as a team failed to hold our seed. We weren't expecting to win a bid to nationals, but we wanted, expected, and with harder running and at times a different attitude, could have earned a second day, which would have meant three wins instead of two. There were a lot of tears, and not of joy or relief. There was just too much sadness on the field.

And then for hours afterward, all we had was talk about the future. Saturday was over, and what we could do but watch the other teams and try to figure out what stood between us and them? A bigger roster, a better mental game, a consistent warm-up routine that wakes and pumps us up, a different mentality toward risk-taking, good dumps, and at this point? Something that always reminds us how much fun ultimate is. The point and a half I played in the Yale game, I was up on my toes defending a girl with a gemini tattoo on her neck; I didn't bite when I knew she was faking, I beat her to the dump cut she was supposed to make, didn't bite again when she faked again, beat her again to the dump cut she was supposed to make, and I saw her get frustrated. Then I think there was a turn, and I remember running upfield and thinking, damn... this is fun!

Granted, it's easier for me to go out on the field, nothing on my shoulders, only one point to think about, and have fun running around and beating my girl, but what happened to that feeling of being exhilirated instead of frightened of what the next point might bring? Instead of dreading fucking up, why not get pumped to lay out? I'm sure I'll feel differently when I'm a senior or a first-year grad, banking on a bid to nationals, playing my last tournament ever... but I hope that even then I'll be psyched to go up against whoever the current superstars are, and be psyched to get a layout D (have yet to do that) or go deep for Nina or watch Lucy pump us up with pom poms. I hope all of the rookies this year will come back to play. I hope some scoped current freshmen will come play as sophomores. I think with enough coercing and personal favors, some of these things will happen...

Another odd thing I noticed--less to do with playing ultimate than being a part of an ultimate community, was the pervasion of ultimate couples. On day two, I tried to find myself a place on the sideline, somewhere between Kolthammer and Lucy, Mack and McDunks, Katie and Sam, and Jefe and McCrazy's flirtations; keep in mind that Harvard Men's (regionals champs!) coach Josh McCarthy and Tufts Women's (regionals runner ups!) coach Sangwha Hong (?) are also married. I not only felt young and short-- but a little pathetic playing with a disc by myself.

Anyhow, on to the nearer future: this summer, I'll be in Taiwan studying at National Taiwan Normal University and I've contacted the Taipei team (Renegade) about playing. It looks to be fun and probably low key as they only practice once a week and sometimes meet up a second time. One of the coordinators is a former captain of the Stanford men's team, though many of the players probably have just about as much experience as I do, and I know I've still a lot to learn, so I'm looking forward to it.

And that's all. The weekend's over.

Time to turn my attention to my nearest future: FINALS.