this sucks, i'm going through an awkward puberty phase 5 years too late. i feel lame not posting stuff on here (since that's i'm on here in the first place), but then i feel lame when i do post because i really have nothing to say. even when my parents call to check and see how i'm doing, i have nothing to say to them because my life is that boring. i see people from home that i know online, but i don't even message them because i'm too nervous to try and carry on a conversation. when i'm around people, i'm not as talkative anymore... it's harder to make myself heard nowadays and i always think the things i say are so retarded. i guess i have a crush on someone, but i'm way too awkward around him, something i haven't done in a long time. generally, i just feel incredibly inadequate which sucks because i made so much progress in the past year, and now i'm relapsing. ahh! why am i so lame? (for those of you who can't look into subtlties, that was a rhetorical question... i don't think i could handle an actual honest answer to that)