Wednesday, October 06, 2004

My Lack of Courage

It has come to my attention over the last few months that what is really holding me back in this life is my inability to say exactly what I need to say when I need to say it. I think it comes from all of those years working in the customer service industry and having to deal with all the a**holes out there who just say whatever they feel because they think since they are not behind the counter they can treat you like crap. I have always said I never wanted to be one of those people who does that, but I think it carried into my personal life a little farther than I wanted it to. I can be at a nice restaurant and not get at all what I ordered, but I do not want to seem like the jerky complaining customer, so I just let it go and overpay for something I did not really want to eat in the first place. I let teachers give me crappy grades on things I do not deserve because I do not want to be that whinny student who complains until they get their grades changed. I am that guy who can never confront any of his friends about things that need to be said, even if it is truly a vital part of the friendship, because I do not want to be that uptight guy who just needs to let things go . I am also that guy who can never ever tell a girl exactly how he feels about her, because I do not want to be mister desperado. So in light of all these things I have decided that I am going to start asserting myself more often, I mean if that is okay with everyone else.

1 comment:

juli said...

fine by me! :) I love you Ross- and I think what you mean abot trying not to be "that guy" but you have to say SOMETHING sometimes.